the set up to something nefarious, probably

out of the blue i got a text asking how i am

who’s this

i stared at the number not recognizing it at all

it’s funny that as a kid i knew all my friends numbers by heart

i could call any of them

or family

dad’s job

it was a no brainer

all those numbers in my head

now i have to stop and think about my own number

so when a random text shows up and they’re not in my phone i’m at a loss

when it rings i let it go to voicemail

if no message is left i google the number assuming it is a robocall or scam or charity or one of a million other people I don’t want to talk to

so a text asking me how i’m doing is an oddity

i wouldn’t put it past the scammers and debt collectors to send texts

a likely way to get an answer a phone call would deny

sneaky bastards

my friend told me once he ignores debt collectors because they knew the debt they purchased was toxic

seems legit to me

you buy toxic debt you can’t be confused when you don’t get paid either

but this random text

probably a wrong number

mistyped a digit and now stuck in this perpetual hell of questioning from a paranoid and possibly delusional man hiding from the triple digits outside

not hiding


who am i fooling

laying naked in bed with the fan blowing and the overtaxed central air blowing for what may be the last month straight

tippity tapping out words

wondering who the mystery text is from

curiouser and curisouer

a reply asking if this is mike

perhaps, but who is this

a fan

that takes me by surprise

the only fan i have is frankly sick of blowing air onto my furry splayed body

i set the phone down and try and read the angles of this new plot twist

what better way to get into my head than by stroking my ego

that is

if my ego thought any more of me than my id

my super ego thinks i’m a bit of an asshole and we haven’t spoken since fifth grade

seems unlikely as i have only one fan and it is oscillating at the foot of bed right now

of your poetry

now i know it’s a scam

a ploy

there is a game being played and i am the unwitting victim

being drawn into the gears of hidden machinations only to be juiced and pulped

not today foul demon

not today

i got your number from your contact page, just wanted to thank you for sharing

oh no you don’t

you’re welcome, just the idiocy that flows through my mind given form, glad you enjoy it

i don’t know what’s happening here

i’m sure this is the set up to something nefarious, probably

if you don’t hear from me again


it probably won’t matter


3 thoughts on “the set up to something nefarious, probably

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