instead of being alone
perhaps
out of fear of it
i was willing
to change
aspects of myself
to better suit
or maybe
camouflage the parts
i despise
but is it better
to be with someone
in another guise
than
to be alone
as myself
that is the quandry
no one
has all the answers
especially
one such as myself
who only
has more
and more
questions
but
lately
i have been
so lonely
so tired
of myself
but the person i am
has finally begun to see
his goals close
to fruition
would i give it all up
to not be alone
that is the real question
one i cannot
fathom
the answer to
the nature
of human nature
is to deny our true natures
molding
ourselves
in the false image
we wish the world could see eagerly shedding
or
hiding those pieces
we wish we could
destroy
but those hidden
truths always find a way
out
into the light
these ghosts of who i am
the spectres of all i have lost
instead
i have to live in make believe
of finding someone
willing
to tend this graveyard
of a man
i am all out of change
and
make believe
though
there is a lesson here
but i’m all out of learning
as well
It’s understandable we question ourselves when the light we saw or believed that kept us going, in some days or even most days we wonder is it an illusion after all? and yet, we are pushing through and chose to believe the guiding light…
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one foot in front of the other, always forward, never back
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