in the mo(u)rning

all i have left
is the empty bottle of pills
and a need for sleep

i’m so tired

of being alone
in pain
suffering silently

it is no pain
that is unique
to me

we all feel
the crushing sorrow
of alienation

we all cry

but as i look
at the remains
of the house of cards
i have built

the hastily patched remains
of not really
holding it all
together

i can hear
the nightingales sing
such a sweet sorrow
they play
in the early morning
as the light
of a new day breaks
just over the horizon

i hear it
yet i cannot bear
this weight i bare
exposing
all the things i lack

no longer love
no more

i’m so tired
of feeling so tired
yet sleep
does not come

and i’m so sick
of feeling so sick
with no relief
in sight

so let me lay my head
on this pillow
send all my love to you
one more time
if i don’t wake
in the morning
know my last wish
was to be with you

let me rest
my weary spirit
let me unload
all this hurt

if i don’t wake
in the morning
don’t shed tears
not for me

say i’m sleeping
forever dreaming
in a place
where we are free

where i love you
and
you love me
simple and free

so if i don’t wake
don’t you worry
it’s the start
of a new day

in the morning
don’t you mourn me
in your heart
i hope i stay

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